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I was scrolling through my internet dating emails with the usual subject headings like, “Hi,”  “Hey,”  or “Hey there!”  Sometimes you get the more adventurous, “I’m a runner too,” “What yoga studio do you go to?”  or “Your eyes are beautiful” (yeah, yeah, I know….).  Or, my favorite, the very original, “No Subject.” …  Scrolling, scrolling, scrolling… and then I see, “Thanks For The Mention.”

…Oh sh*t.  Who did I offend??  But the email was not a lecture about how I’m too judgmental and my standards are too high and I deserve to be single forever.  It says the following, and I am cutting/pasting verbatim because it was that awesome:

“Hey there!  Thanks for including my opening line in your blog.  I got quite the kick out of seeing it in there.  And for the record, I am not a comedian!  I’m just a skeptical smart-ass who also thinks he’s going to be single forever.  By the way, I love your blog!  It always makes me laugh.  Keep up the good work.  And good luck to you!  As you already know, we both will need a ton of it on a dating site like this.”

Wow.  Thanks!   But… what on Earth?   I obviously saw this person’s pictures, and he lives in my city, but I have no idea who he is.  Exactly how did he make the connection between my pictures, my dating screen name, and theperpetualbachelorette?  I don’t mention my screen name or my city when I write, which was in an effort to remain anonymous.  (Until a publisher offers me a book deal and I can quit my job and be Carrie-Bradshaw-famous).  And I definitely don’t mention my blog in my dating profile.  What would I say?  “Hi, my name is…  I love sports, I don’t cook, and I don’t believe in internet dating but I’m doing it to write a blog and make fun of how ridiculous some of you are.  Here’s the link.  Check it out!”    I already have trouble dating.  Pretty sure that would sabotage my efforts.  Maybe he saw the blog link posted on one of my friends Facebook pages?  But it would still be hard to make the connection.

So I wrote back and asked him.  And he hasn’t written back.  Come on, man.  Don’t Houdini.  Lets talk about this.  Maybe get together and write a he said / she said column?  I know you have time.  You said it yourself:

We’re going to be single forever.

TPB

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