One of the guys I haven’t mentioned that emailed me recently has a line his his profile that says, “I don’t have much of a poker face so I’m a pretty easy person to read- and I follow my heart…So I’d describe myself as Captain Obvious.” Ok. I prefer a man who divulges too much rather than one who ‘withholds the truth.’ Newsflash to you all: withholding the truth is the same as lying. But that’s a rant for another day…
Captain Obvious emailed me first. He said he liked my smile and was interested, so I checked out his pictures and profile. Tall, athletic, attending graduate school, no kids… he passed the initial screen. So I emailed him and said, “So, Captain Obvious, what are you going back to school for?” I thought that was a pretty decent initial conversation-starting email. It’s better than, “Hi. How r u?”
I will copy/paste his entire response for you:
“i’m going back for mechanical engineering”
O…K… What am I supposed to do with that?? Care to elaborate? Or ask me a question perhaps? So I do the obvious. Nothing.
2 weeks later, I get another email from the Captain titled “Let’s…”
And the body of the email says, “get together sometime :)”
Are you serious? For writing/entertainment purposes, I might have to take him up on the offer. I feel I would be doing my experiment an injustice if I passed on opportunities like this. Don’t worry, I will meet him at a public place, and have an escape plan.
As far as I know, the main goal of this site is to find a match for yourself. A significant other. A relationship. A future spouse. I would think that the only reason you would engage in communication with someone is that you think they have the potential to fill that role and you want to eventually meet them. That is how my logic works, but apparently that is not the case for some of these guys. Take for example someone I found who is from close to my hometown. First, let me back up… A few weeks ago I was over at a married friend’s house and she wanted to search through my matches. She also did her own search for fun, putting in her own criteria to see what she would come up with. But remember that every time you view someone’s profile, they are able to see that you’ve done this. She thought this was hilarious, but I knew better. I knew the next day I’d end up with 30 emails from guys who were far from my type. Which is exactly what happened. I deleted most of them, but there was one I actually read because the guy looked cute. To my horror, it said, “Dating kind of late, huh? LOL”
I was fuming. What a jerk! I get that I’m slightly past the traditional age that most women marry (whatever that even is these days…), but I refuse to settle. And I refuse to be harassed about it by some cruel, brainless moron who thinks it’s funny to crack age jokes to females. I started drafting a heated response and called one of my friends to vent. She said, “Are you sure he didn’t mean late like at night?” Hmm… a possibility… But the site doesnt’ show you what time someone checked you out? However, maybe she’s right. I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt, but I still wanted an answer. So I emailed back and said, “I really hope you meant late at night…?” And he wrote back, “Yes, it was like 11pm.” I’m not sure how he knew that, but I felt better and we kept emailing. This is when we discovered that we are from the same city. We went back and forth about what we miss and what we don’t. We had some good email exchanges going, but I will cut/paste parts of the last 3 so you understand where I’m going with this.
Him: Yes, I have been on and off this site for years. I met my ex of 2 years on this site so it does work if you put the work in. And yes it is work as you are probably seeing.
Me: Yes, this is totally work! You really have to put a lot of time in to looking through pictures, reading profiles, and sending emails. How long do you usually talk to someone before you ask to meet them? And what makes you want to meet someone vs. the people you don’t? And when you said your ex… were you married or just an ex girlfriend?
Him: I typically ask people out pretty quickly. I don’t like to waste my time. It’s easier to meet first and go from there. Just opinion anyway.
Gotcha. That message was blatantly obvious. If you’re not going to ask me out, why are you wasting your time emailing me?
I’m going to be single forever.