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Today I’m shifting from dating mode to detective mode. 

One of the many features of this website that is taking up way too much of my time is that it allows you to see who has looked at your profile.  This means anyone who clicked on your pictures or your about me section, even if they decided not to contact you.  Most of the time I’m ok with that, but occasionally I’ll come across a guy who has viewed me but not contacted me that I would actually be interested in.  Which got me thinking  what other options do they have?  I know everyone is looking for something different, and not everyone is attracted to the same thing, but what else is out there?  What kind of girls are on this site that I’m competing against?  Granted, it’s not a true competition like an episode of The Bachelor where we are all fighting for the same man, but these guys do have hundreds of other options and I was really curious to see what these other girls were putting out there.  What are they doing differently than I am?  Also, what makes womens profiles different than the thousands of mens profiles I’ve gone through?   

My first problem was that I couldnt just go searching for girls through my log-in.  Theyd see that I viewed them, and that would be creepy and weird So one of my guy friends who is also on the site was kind enough to give me his info so I could search as him, provided I promised not to chat with any girls while I was logged in.  (Personally I thought it would make for some more comical writing material, but he was doing me a favor so I couldnt push it).  Commence recon mission as GolferUSC. 

I should probably clarify what I was expecting to find by doing this.  I had a feeling most of the girls would have bikini pictures, tons of cleavage and tight clothes, gold-digging mentalities, lengthy profiles that used emoticons after every sentence and excessive use of the word like.  It was supposed to end up being a really funny post where I could just make fun of them for attempting to attract men using the wrong kind of attention-getting tactics, and put them in the same category as their white-sunglass-wearing male counterparts.  Wellnot so fast my friend.  My second problem with the detective attempt was that I was surprisingly very, very wrong.  I started with age as the first criteria, putting in late 20s and early 30s to be close to my own.  I took out the smokers (of course), chose women who at least had a bachelors degree, and put in a small 5 mile radius around my zip code.  I tried to look for those who would be as similar to me as possible without getting too specific.  I got over 100 matches.  I found one, just one, girl who had a full bikini picture posted.  Only 1 bathroom mirror picture, and 2 over-the-top boob pictures.  Hmm maybe its because of the age demographic?  So I started to read some of the profiles.  They were  shocking.  Well written, succinct, emoticon-free, and confident.  These girls know what they want, and are not willing to deal with any B.S.  They have jobs, a sense of humor, and independence They insert quotes like, Peter Pan complexes need not apply.  Looking for someone to compliment my life, not complicate it.  Do something every day that scares you.  Eleanor Roosevelt.  Theyre pretty awesome.  Theyre girls I would be friends with.  They’re…  just like me.  It appears that in our wanna-be big city, there is a pretty big discrepancy between female quality over quantity vs. male quantity over quality. 

Sigh.  I’m going to be single forever.

TPB

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